The Importance of a Good Trim. A Life Trim.

August 13, 2016 Off By La Donna Finnels-Neal

Trimming HairYesterday, I sat in front of the mirror staring at freshly washed hair and contemplating.  Should I do it or shouldn’t I?  Finally, before I could talk myself out of it I took the scissors and made the first cut.  Snip.  Two inches gone from one section.  Snip snip.  Another two to three inches gone from another section.  With each snip I started to feel better.  Relax more.  I had been TERRIFIED to cut my hair because I just couldn’t stand the thought of having to take the time to grow it back.  But with each new cut I saw new life.  The hair that was left was healthier, stronger.  

About half way through, my son walked in the room said “why are you cutting your hair?!”  I paused for a minute.  A little regret set in.  But it was already too late.  I was halfway done.  And what is it with men and hair anyway?  I mean, it’s not like I was shaving it off!  But I digress.  So I continued.

When I finished my little project, I realized it was not as bad as I thought it would be.  In fact, it was better.  All the old damaged hair was gone and guess what…I still had hair!  I could still do the things I could do before, only it was healthier and much stronger.  It made me think about the importance of pruning.  

A few years ago I did some MAJOR pruning in my life.  Life changing pruning.  I had to cut off the dead and the dying.  Dead jobs, dead and dying relationships, dead behaviors and thoughts.  Before making these changes, I had also sat…looking in the mirror and trying to get real with myself.  Looking at the dead all around me.  Scared to cut it off.  And like with my hair…before I could think about it anymore (but after praying to God of course), I made the first cut.  And then the next and then the next.  With each new cut I felt myself growing.  Feeling better.  Getting stronger, until finally…my life was freshly pruned.  Again, while making those cuts, I had people come into my life right from the beginning and ask “What are you doing?”  “Why are you making such drastic changes?!”  And even then, I had to pause.  Ask myself…are you doing the right thing?  Are you making the right decision?  

But I did make the right decisions.  For me.  For my growth.

People do not like change.  I’m no exception.  And I don’t care what anybody says…change is HARD!  We find ourselves holding on to things that are long dead either because we are afraid of starting something new, we are afraid of what people will say, and I think mostly, because we are afraid of how long it will take or how hard it will be for what we perceive as starting over.  

But it’s all about perspective.

Every day we get to start over.  We begin anew.  Every day God gives us new life.  EVERY day.  Just like the hair that was cut, every day new hair begins to grow.  But we can’t see the new because we are still holding on to the old.  The damaged.  It weighs us down.  It looks ugly.  It feels ugly.  It makes us feel bad.  Each day, the eye goes directly to what’s wrong.  To focusing on the split ends and the damage instead of the healthy new growth.   Pretty soon, we let the damage infiltrate all the new growth.  The split ends keep going up and up and before long the new growth is too now…dead.  We listen to others that don’t truly understand, but only see the surface.  “Girl, don’t cut your hair!  You’ve grown it so long.”  They don’t see that you are masking the damage with a plethora of products.  They like your hair that way.  It’s the same with life changes.  “Oh my gosh!  You’re quitting your job?  You’re breaking up?  You’re becoming a vegetarian?”  And so on.  They don’t see nor are they invested in the struggles you have gone through to try to revive something that was long dead.  Nor do they care.  It’s a personal thing.  It feels personal.  Your change also makes them uncomfortable, and they want you to stay just as you are.

But…for growth…we have to cut the damage off.  We have to prune.  And unlike hair where we may decide to trim once or twice a year or like trees, where there’s a specific season; our lives have to be in a CONSTANT state of pruning.  Attacking the split ends and the damage with a vengeance.  Cutting off the ugly IMMEDIATELY before it has the chance to grow and destroy the new life.  It’s the only way it stays healthy.  Strong.  Beautiful.

If you find yourself looking at a life full of damage and split ends, I encourage you to cut it.  It’s scary, but it’s necessary.  And once you start to see all the positive results, you definitely won’t regret it!

La Donna